5 Years in the Making

“Simon Says Don't Do Drugs. Those are my sound words of advice to anyone stupid enough to listen to my advice.

I'm moving into my new house for university next year, and I still haven't packed.

Instead I'm on here, writing this drivel that only I will ever read. But despair not, this Blog may become famous one day, and be heralded as one of the greatest pieces of literature of our time alongside "Lord Of the Rings", "Harry potter" and "Football-Its a funny game” by Kevin Keegan". And the day that happens, my friends, I will eat my hat.

But first I'll need to buy a hat.”


A long time has past since I wrote that little parable hovering above these words. Not sure the exact dates, as I was too young and naïve to bother dating anything (including girls). But the year was 2004, the month, September-ish.

Things clearly haven’t changed much in the past five years, because I still procrastinate when there are vastly more important things to do. Things like, thwart this mad hunger in my stomach by making something to eat. But that can wait a little while longer, back to September 2004.

I was about to commence my life at university. I didn’t apply for university through the proper channels, instead I got accepted into Uni two weeks (that’s right count them, two, it won’t take long) before the start of term. Everything became a mad rush; I was totally unprepared for what was ahead. I didn’t even have basic living stuffs to live with, so a quick trip to ASDA was in order, ransacking their Smartprice crockery section. All this despite the fact I’d never really created my own culinary delicacies other than toast, crumpets or other bread based products. And for all the years of catering for myself, I can still barely cook.

Well University swiftly arrived and the following three years could probably be described as the best three years of my life. It is scary how fast they past me by. Many fond memories as well as many regrets. But I wouldn’t have given it up for anything. I’m afraid I’m getting too sentimental and sloppy, so its time to fast forward. I can cover the mushy details in a more humorous light at a later date.

Spin on a further five years to me sitting here, writing this. It only took me five years to actually finish my first blog entry, not that it really covered much anyway. The next one will be a much swifter. For future entries I can promise nothing but a surreal commentary on my life and a significant amount of vitriol directed towards my ever increasingly worrying collection of pet peeves, of which there are many. Time to eat! Something bland no doubt. Bread products seem most likely.

PS I still haven’t bought a hat.

02 October 2009